Some things of which I need to share. Or something.

4 Feb

I have noticed a couple of growing problems that need to be addressed. First, ladies, if you have a television appearance, just go get your lip waxed. Whether you think you have a mustache or not, go get your lip waxed. I’m not sure if these fancy schmancy cameras and lights just bring out a mustache where there appeared to be none before or what, but I can ‘t take it. Maybe it’s the recession. Maybe women are making sacrifices. And who doesn’t get behind on those expensive salon visits sometimes? I mean, this is coming from a woman who has some ashy roots showing on otherwise brassy hair. But if I was going on TV, darn-tootin’ I’d figure a way to get it fixed. Go get your lip waxed! This is your moment of fame! Don’t let it be overshadowed by a 5 o’clock shadow!

Next, also for the ladies (guys, I guess you are doing okay lately because I have nothing to scold you about), and this is important (note the all caps and separate paragraph):

DO NOT TAKE A PICTURE OF YOURSELF IN THE MIRROR OR IN YOUR CAR MAKING KISSY FACES FOR A PROFILE PIC. It makes you look dumb and desperate. And vain. And like you have no friends that could take a pic of you if you really needed one. And like you might possess the maturity of a 14 year old. The worst is  when there are whole albums of pictures you took of yourself. And don’t try to hold your arm down so that we can’t tell. We can. Just stop. Now, I’m sure I have offended someone who is probably a really nice person whom I actually like outside of the internet. But, it’s for your own good. And I can’t think of anyone specific off the top of my head so I’m going for it.

While I’m on this facebook kick, take a moment to consider whether your kid learning to poo-poo on the big boy potty is really something for a public forum or if maybe you should just call your mom/sister instead.

I don’t mean to offend anybody. I’m just trying to help. Everyone’s thinking it.

Now, in non-judgy, nicer news, I’m reading a new book (I’m always reading a new book. This one is just worth sharing). I saw it mentioned over at Nesting Place and, in very non-Heather fashion, I just felt compelled to immediately order it. It’s called “One Thousand Gifts” and is by Ann Voskamp. I’m not prepared to write a review as I’m only through three chapters, but it’s  fascinating so far. It was hard to read at first because she writes in a kind of poetic way that isn’t straightforward and I’m pretty sure not actually “correct.” As in, my 8th grade literature teacher (What up, Mrs. Lambert?!) would not have let me get away with it but she might have read it in her spare time. But, the story she’s telling is so captivating that it’s worth wading through the sometimes convoluted prose. Anyway, look it up. It seems promising.

Next, I’m going to tell you about E-Mealz. Sorry for rambling, but session starts on Monday and I’m just trying to get everything off my chest while there’s still time! So, like I said, E-Mealz. I hate it. But, you might like it and it’s cheap enough to try for the heck of it. Here’s why I hate it.

1.) The recipes are kind of sucky. By that I mean they are really simple and basic for the most part as far as ingredients go. It’s just kind of plain food. And I like exciting food. With lots of melted cheese. I feel pretty confident that you can have good, tasty food on a budget.

2.) The recipes are hard to read. I don’t recommend it for people who are not confident cooks. Sometimes they don’t tell you whether or not to cover something, what temp to cook it at, how long to cook, etc. You have to wing some things.

3.) They expect you to go to the grocery store once a week. Um, no.

Now, the good things about E-Mealz are that, like I said, it is cheap to try (3 months of meal plans for $15) and I have learned one or two new recipes that I like and may keep.

In church news, I have been going to Metropolitan Baptist Church and I really like it. The services have great music leaders and they preach straight from the Bible which is important to me. Also, the congregation size is really nice. There is a mix of young and old without it being too large. There’s a definite sense of community. I think I will try Sunday School soon. Sometimes Jillian and/or Drew goes with me, so that’s another plus.

And, finally, I would like to introduce my brother’s blog to you. He’s a nut but he’s pretty entertaining. Enjoy!


2 Responses to “Some things of which I need to share. Or something.”

  1. Laurie February 8, 2011 at 10:27 am #

    Howdy Heather,
    I’m glad that you have found a church that you enjoy. Jason pointed out to me that Paul Purifoy is the music director there. He led our worship here a few weeks ago. Neat guy. Jason also said that he hears really good things about that church. On another note, save that book for me to read. Please and thank you!

  2. cathy February 8, 2011 at 8:57 pm #

    Hey lady-
    I’ll simply say, it’s a good thing I don’t have to make television appearances! Waxing hurts like heck, but so does not taking care of the problem. Just hurts ya in a different way. Hope you guys are well prepared for this next round of winter. Stay safe.

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